December 7, 2019
Ft. Pierce, FL 
27.28.016 N
80.19.677 W


We arose early today; me at 5:30 (and the world didn’t come to a screeching halt); Dale at 6:30 and listened to Chris Parker for the weather report.  Dale had been analyzing our weather reports for a couple of days and telling me that when I returned, we’d be leaving the next day before noon to get a good jump on heading south.

I arrived at 8 pm Friday night into Ft. Lauderdale.  Seven thirty am today, Saturday, we took my laundry in to be washed and ate breakfast next door.  He dropped me off at the boat, returned the rental car and finally checked us out of Harbortown Marina where we had left our boat for the past month.  Harbortown has been so very kind to us making adjustments as needed with little warning and often a change of plans on the spur of the moment. 

Nine thirty he put on his scop patch in an abundance of caution as he sometimes suffers from seasickness when newly at sea. I turned on the engines at 10:30 and we pulled away from the pier 10 minutes later, looking like we knew what we were doing in front of the small group of onlookers gathered (tight maneuvering always draws the attention of anyone nearby).  We saw a few dolphins as we left the marina channel and made the turn to head out of the Ft. Pierce inlet; dolphins are a sign of good luck to most sailors; we were looking for all signs of good luck we could find today.  

Although it started off rather brisk, the day was sunny and warming up beautifully.  We passed the Ft. Pierce jetty at 10 minutes after 11 am and turned south into flat calm seas stopping and turning into the slight breeze to put up our sails.  We ended up rolling in the Code Zero (used only in very light winds) as there just wasn’t any wind but left out our main (so we’d at least looked like a sail boat) revved up the engines, put in a waypoint for St. Lucie and motored on. 

November had been a bad month for my family and me.  Telephone calls at 3 in the morning are never good, so when the first one came in on 11/9 telling me that my mother was back in this hospital after having only been released 2 days prior, I knew it wasn’t good.  She had coded, they had revived her but she no longer showed any brain waves.  Although our father had DNR instructions in his medical records, my mother did not.  As I am the oldest, their designated executor and guardian, I told my sister who was with her not to resuscitate again as my mother was vehemently against living in a nursing home and now, that was her only recourse.  The next call was 30 minutes later saying that she had died.  Dale and I were on a plane to Dallas a few hours later. 

As I mentioned earlier, I am the oldest of 5 and it was the first time in years that we had all been together.  We organized the funeral and afterwards, took lots of photos; some serious, some silly.  It was a good thing. 


Dad has Alzheimers and is essentially bedridden, so my sister Marcie who was already helping Mom take care of Dad knew that she was his sole caregiver (besides the various daily nurses that come in to check on him).  Although Dale returned to Florida after a week, I stayed behind another week and set about paying off all their bills, taxes, cancelling credit cards and services no longer needed.  Basically, setting things in motion so that Marcie could continue without having to worry about finances.  I returned to Florida on a Friday. 

Saturday 11/23 was my birthday.   Dale, Gerry and Nicky (Tinkering Consultant and She Who Must Be Obeyed) took me out to a local restaurant for a great dinner.  We were getting underway the following morning at high tide which was at 7:30am and were discussing the various plans.  That night, the second 3am call came in.  This time it was my sister, Marcie.  She had been out with one of her friends, was driving home on a dark, unlit country road and failed to negotiate a curve going off a steep embankment.  We could see from the ruts left behind that she was trying to bring the truck back onto the road but in turning perpendicular to the steepness, she instead rolled the truck onto the drivers’ side and slid into a tree pinning herself inside the vehicle.  It took first responders and hour and a half to find her as she was literally in a cow pasture with no lights still functioning. 

Those in the medical field or those who have experience in these types of accidents can tell you that there is a type of injury that doesn’t show until a person is cut out of the car.  Then they crash.  That was Marcie.  She was conscious the whole time, honking the horn when instructed and, I’m told, that she had a bit of a sense of humor until she was removed from the truck.  She coded in the life flight helicopter and then one last time at the hospital.  She had only a single tiny cut visible on her temple; presumably from glass and a bit of juniper in her hair that showed any indication of what had happened.  Once again, the family gathered. 

In the week that Dale stayed with me this time, he was able to contact Dad’s physicians, straightened out his medicines and helped us gather the various military records I would need to have him placed in a Veteran’s Home.  As he requires round the clock care and no one lives near, there was no other choice. 

My brother and sisters rallied as we knew that early in Dad’s condition, he had taken out a reverse mortgage on their home and both had accumulated 50 years’ worth of stuff on their property that now needed to be sorted out or sold in order to take care of him.  Additionally, Marcie had brought all of her belongings when she moved to Texas which were stored now on the property.  To say that this was a monumental undertaking is an understatement but we divided the tasks and made progress. 

Then, the attorney I had consulted told me that the Court would not approve me to be my mother’s executor as I would be out of the country.  It was either give up the trip, or learn to let go. 

I spent my remaining time concentrating on getting Dad in and settled in his new home and setting up the finances to take care of him.  Marcie’s husband, children and various nieces and nephews helped sort through dividing what was hers from what was theirs.  My brother and sisters helped sort through Mom’s things, dividing what we were going to keep with what would go for sale.  My sister, Carolyn, the only one who actually lives in Texas, will now be the designated executor.  

I agonized over the decision as I’ve never side stepped a responsibility, particularly one involving family.  In some respect, I feel as if I’m giving up my promise to protect them.  However, ultimately it was family that said go.  Dale and I have been planning this trip since before we were first married.  Back then, it was a pipe dream.  Over the years it became a possibility and then, a reality.  As neither one of us is a spring chicken, its now or never. 


So here we are, on a beautiful sunny Florida day heading south.  Not perfect sailing conditions as there is no wind but definitely perfect motoring conditions as there are no waves.  We’re close to shore so we can keep our cell phones active but each time mine rings or a text comes in, my chest tightens and I say a quick prayer that its only to answer a question here or there and nothing more.  And as Scarlett would say, “tomorrow is another day;” we will survive this.